Thursday, October 27, 2005

Oral Sex

Yes, oral sex. I think we should talk more about oral sex, as it is not a nasty thing, when done between two people who love each other.

Oral sex can be used either in foreplay or as substitute for intercourse when you are short on time. Of course, at times oral sex is actually desired over intercourse and at those times much more attention should be paid to the receivee of the oral sex to ensure they receive 15 to 20 minutes of total selfish pleasure.

Let's not forget the famous *69*, in which both partners pleasure each other orally simultaneously. In this position I prefer be on top of my gf, as I can kind of trap her into swallowing. ;)

Women and Swallowing

For the life of me I do not understand the problem some women have with oral sex. With the swallowing of seminal fluid, to be precise. I mean, HELLO!!! Do you really think we men are not swallowing your fluids as you buck your hips and grab our hair? What do you think we are doing down there as you grind our faces into you? SHEESH! How would you like it if we stopped every time your goo got in our mouth and said *ewwww!! grosss!!* and ran to the bathroom to spit? You'd be on Oprah screaming and whining!

You all DO know that sperm is chock full of protein right? Atkins would agree with me! Skip the bun and bite the sausage ladies! And contrary to urban legend (mostly made up by me) sperm MUST be swallowed for the protein to be absorbed. The old sperm facial is just a lie....unless I feel like telling it, then it is the Gospel truth. ;)

But if you won't swallow, it has to go somewhere, that is just the truth, and I'm NOT coming into any kleenex just to make you happy. Oral sex is supposed to make ME happy and you saying don't come in my mouth come on the kleenex makes the ejaculation....nowhere near as fun as coming down your throat (or at least in your hair).

Hopefully this will help someone out there to realize that oral sex is a wonderful thing and that not swallowing is tantamount to a man just getting off you right after his orgasm. If you are offended by this post, it means you need to GET SOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4 Comments:

Blogger Spill The Beans said...

You are the kindest, most sensitive man on the planet. Any woman would clearly be lucky to have you.

8:29 AM  
Blogger Spill The Beans said...

and ought to consider it a privilege to swallow.

8:30 AM  
Blogger Steer Pike Pie said...

That is all 123% true.

11:11 AM  
Blogger Spill The Beans said...

I know. I'm 123% certain that it is.

11:38 AM  

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